It’s hard to articulate the interconnected intricacies of our Feminine Pain, pain that goes far beyond our physical body. The pain of deep shame anchored in a belief that we are broken, wrong and not good enough; the mind consuming lack of self-acceptance and the endless attempts to find our fix; scared to feel & express our emotions because we believe they are unwelcome; our unwillingness to share our truth because we think that no one can handle it; the way that we keep ourselves from shining too brightly because there is shame in that too... Women’s pain is deep and complex. Body love, body appreciation, self-love & self-acceptance, simply feeling at home in our body are all feelings that remain elusive to many women. The constant & consuming burden of being in a woman’s beats the drum of desires to be something other than we are.
Thinner. More toned. Less curvaceous. More curvaceous... Diets & hardcore exercise. Feeling like shit in every piece of clothing we try on. Inconvenienced by our menstrual cycle.
This is just the tip of the iceberg. Our Modern World and Western Culture has caused us to disconnect from our Centre and abandon who we are at our Core. The fierce forms of the feminine have been undernourished by the suppression of our softness, slowness, stillness, and simplicity.
Not only have we tried to fit ourselves into a tight suffocating box, living in ways that uphold someone else’s values, we’ve let go of our rituals and traditions that once served to nourish our physical, emotional and spiritual centre. Leaving us feel undervalued, undernourished, unexpressed and overwhelmed.
The disconnect we have from our feminine body is severe. We have learned to believe in our body’s faultiness. It’s too emotional, too hormonal, too unpredictable. It’s just too much
From our earliest experience of becoming a woman and how we are introduced to our menstrual cycle, to how we refer to our vulva & vagina, to our experience of sex, pregnancy, birth, motherhood and beyond, there is an underlying current that reverberates the message that a woman’s body is wrong in some way. We feel like we have been sent to navigate through our lives in a vessel full of flaws that is certain to sink. Yet deep down, we have an inner knowing that this isn’t the truth. Deep down we know that there is something more available to us. More presence, more ease, more joy, calm, more pleasure, more simplicity. Peace.
Society reinforces what we have learned to be true:
Be sexy, but not too sexy, that’s slutty and scandalous.
Be confident, but not too loud or opinionated. That’s irritating and embarrassing.
Ask for what you want! In your work, your relationship, and in the bedroom. But don’t expect to get it. That’s needy, pushy, and naggy! That’s setting yourself up for failure.
“You can do it all!” “Work hard.” “Don’t whinge! Successful people don’t complain, they deal with it & get on with it.” Oh, but you should know when to ask for help, you don't need to be a martyr.
Our bodies are riddled with shame. Shhh don't talk about it. Suppress it. Hide it. Do whatever you need to do to make it go away. Make it disappear, because we can’t handle it.
Don’t ask about that. You can’t ask about that! You don’t need to know. Just take this pill, it will fix it.
You shouldn’t have been there. What were you doing there? Why were you there? Are you sure you said no?
You’re just going to have to stop doing that.
You’re going to need surgery. It’s just a tiny little thing it won’t hurt at all. You don't have any other options.
You can’t be ready to push, we’d know if you were ready to push. You need to push NOW! Just be thankful you have a healthy baby, & that you are alive. You do know that breast is best, right?
We are taught to numb our experience & not to trust our body. Toughen up and get on with it. At the same time, we are tormented with messages that our body is incapable, not resilient enough, and incapable. We have so many ‘rules’ to live by, and each one of them contradicts the next. In our physical society, we focus on the physical aspects of miscarriage, abortion, pregnancy, birth, and our transition into motherhood & beyond, ignoring that these are all incredibly emotional experiences, and our knowing that we are way more than our physical bodies. We are left with a heaviness that we push into the depths of our being, believing that our feelings are invalid, wrong & an overreaction.
No wonder women feel
- Like used goods
- Too saggy
- Not a real woman
- Like my body has failed me
- Inconvenient and embarrassing
- Chaotic and unpredictable
- Just doesn’t seem to work like other women’s bodies
- Maybe there is just something wrong with me
Our pain can be noisy and turbulent, other times it’s more subtle and harder to detect. Do you ever get that sensation that you feel like there is something more for you, but you don’t know what? A sensation that there has to be a better way of living. Our concealed pain often tugs at our intuition, asking to be recognised. The root of our pain often seeds from a learned sense of shame. If we can gift ourselves the opportunity to unlearn our shame & answer the soft calls of our intuition, we can reveal our pathway to heal ourselves from our pain.
These 3 hour sessions are individually unique, but will generally include:
- Initial consultation (simple chat) regarding your overall health & wellbeing, your therapeutic goals/Intentions, along with an exploration of your pelvic health.
- A personalised guided connection practice to help you feel more deeply into your body.
- Therapeutic techniques to help restore balance - including (but not limited to) Womb & Pelvic Floor Massage, Focused Breathwork, Guided Mediation, Aromatherapy, & Movement Therapy.
- Reflective contemplation/debrief - opportunity for integration/processing of therapy.
- Facilitated guidance to creating a home practice/ritual that you can integrate into day to day life.
- Education & guidance will be provided during the entire session.
- Informed consent will be acquired throughout the entire session.
Investment = $350
Private Health Rebate Available
These sessions are offered from Element Wellness & Healing & from my home practice in Balwyn. Please phone, or text for appointment.
HOW MANY SESSIONS WILL I REQUIRE?
Every woman is different & how many sessions you require/want will be unique to you. Some women come with a simple curiosity to learn more about their body & connect to their body more deeply, often these women have a single session & re-book in for quarterly or half-yearly sessions. Women who have experienced trauma (sexual, medical, surgical, or birth trauma), or who experience Pelvic Pain, usually desire to have more regular sessions. I generally recommended an integration period of about 4-6 weeks between sessions, though this is not always the case. In any case, how often you decide to engage with these sessions is completely up to you. Though I will offer some guidance, you, your body, and your unique situation will be the best guide as to how regular your sessions are, & how many you choose to experience.
CAN I CLAIM THESE SESSIONS ON PRIVATE HEALTH?
Yes! Depending on the type of cover you have, you may claim these sessions on Private Health under Physiotherapy.
WHAT IF I DON'T FEEL COMFORTABLE WITH INTERNAL PELVIC THERAPY?
Ensuring that you feel safe during this entire experience is my number one priority. If at any time during the session you begin to feel uncomfortable we can redirect your session in a way that has you feeling safe. Whilst I am here to facilitate your experience, you are ultimately in control of the session. There is no expectation that you need to get to any particular point during your session. I will continuously check-in with you to see how you are feeling, & what is showing up for you to be sure that you feel safe & in control every step of the way.
I AM STILL UNSURE IF THIS IS THE RIGHT KIND OF THERAPY FOR ME, WHAT CAN I DO?
It is great that you recognise your uncertainty. This kind of therapy does require a level of vulnerability, as well as a sense of connection with your therapist. I welcome you to email or phone me so that you can get to know me better, & ask any questions that you may have regarding Feminine Body Connection Sessions.